..the separated soul..

..hi Baby..” I decide to ring him before his work is almost over
..hi Daddy, how’s your day going?..
..i’m good thank you, hows your day at work?..” we should skip this niceties, but he always ask about how am I. At his first question.
..been busy today, have some work need to be done, I might run a little later, you know where to go to have dinner later? Can we meet there?..” he speak rather quick.
..owh ok, I will text you later where I will have dinner ok? Around 8:00PM is good?..” I ask. He must be tired from all day work and still need to have overtime.
..8:00PM is good, text me later where to go ya?..” he kept putting a ‘ya’ when he end a question, that is some typical from the mother language he is born I assume.
..ok, I’ll see you later at dinner then. Love you..
..love you too..
click’ I hang up the phone. The battle within me is still quarreling. Should I tell him the truth about me not knowing when will be returning to visit him? I have a lot to think and take care about when I return home in Nahant. Maybe I can ask him to move for me. No, that’s too difficult for him, he has his relative in here, asking him to leave his home country is just not right. I would not putting him in such situation. Especially, we just have this relationship not for long, he could have had said no.
He arrived 7 minutes before 8:00PM, that’s what I like from him, as far as I remembered with our meeting appointment, he always arrived several minutes early. I decided to have dinner at this Italian restaurant, La Luciolla, the review online is good. A little further from the hotel where I stay now, but always curious to know a good place to eat. Everyone who know me, they would understand, why do I always pay a visit at good reviewed restaurants.
Our routines in the morning, we usually awake around 6:00AM, we cuddles for half an hour, and then we get ready to have our breakfast at the hotel restaurant, the hotel allows give a voucher of free breakfast for two as usual. I try to introduce him to have bread with jam for breakfast, which he did eat for several time, but he said “..when I ate bread in the morning, I usually felt hungry before it lunch time, it last shorter compared to when I ate rice..” Again, to customs where he live his whole life is teaching him that way, beside when we went to the supermarket, bread prices in here is more expensive than rice compare to the prices in my hometown, where it goes the contrary.
..so, today is half a day of work for me, you have any plan for later?..” he ask.
..not much, maybe we can hit the beach later after your work is over? Maybe 66 or Kuta?..” I don’t really have plan, but walk at the beach would be good.
..ok then, that sounds good..” he finishes his fried rice.
After our breakfast we went to our room, he is getting ready to work. I can’t believe tomorrow is my departure. Time fly, without you realizing it, when you enjoy it.
..ok Daddy, I’ll see you later then..” he give me a kiss before he is off.
..ok Baby, you have a good day at work..
I have a rather shocking news when I check the stock exchange, it drops down overnight, that cause me losing a couple thousand bucks. Such news when I am about to return home. I began to feel lazy to do anything, I have lunch near the hotel, I actually have to drag myself out of the room. I was sad about leaving the island, and now this. The feeling are rather unexplainable. A mix feeling, when you just wish to erase from your mind but it stays, and you can’t get rid of.
..so how’s your day? Doing anything interesting?..” he put his bag on the couch, i watch the news on TV trying to take the bad new off my mind.
..it was ok, not much, just have lunch next door..” I continue watching the screen on Television. He sat next to me then lay his head on my lap, as usual, he wanted to rest a little before we head out.
..are you ok?..
..yes, why?..” I ask, trying to hide my troubled mind from him.
..I’m not sure, you rather quite since I arrive, and you just went out for lunch?..” he is trying to find something that is not right with me.
..i have a bad news this morning after you left, but you should not worry, I will be alright..” I try not to give more details. That should be enough for him.
..sorry to hear that, is your family OK in Nahant? Your friends OK too?..” see, he is not someone who you can give half information, and he will let it be. He will try to know more, he is the type of a guy who is curious, and he will stop only when he is satisfied with his curiosity.
..no, not that, my families and friends are OK back home..” I hesitate continuing breaking the news for him. He is looking at me. His innocents and curious eyes, got me not able to tell lie, even though it is a while lie. “..this morning I found out that the stock drop down and cost me losing money..” I try not to give him further details about the exact amounts.
..owh, sorry to hear, well, maybe later we can have dinner at a reasonable price restaurants, yes?..” that just how he is, trying to find a way not to cost more.
..don’t worry, it wasn’t that bad, I still can afford food, it is a rather upsetting news for me, that is all..” I explain. I try to rewind what just come out from my mouth, that’s when it hit me, ‘..why do I let this ruin my holiday? It always been that way, they drop down and then slowly they raise again..’.
..look, we always went out at night, and always got us to a little pricey restaurants, sure the food is good, and I can’t afford it at all time as you already know, maybe we try something simpler near 66 beach later..” I never look at that way, when we have dinner, most of the time I pay it without thinking, the prices to the places we went are rather acceptable, comparing to the food I have to pay where I come from. But I never realize that it is troubling him. He did pay several time, but I know he didn’t earn much, knowing the average wages in here are rather saddening.
..tonight is our last night together, I want to eat at a nice place with you..” I reason
..I am aware of that, but can’t we just eat at a less fancy restaurant? Beside you just lost some cash on you, it’s time for you to cut back the expenses, no?..” he is very understanding with his explanation. But for our last night together, I would want to treat him good. He gave me this feeling that I thought I would never have. Love.
“..we’ll see..” we stop our little arguments there. He still rest his head on my lap. The TV still on, showing news about flood in the central the country, Jakarta, that the water level is unbelievably off the chart.

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